NOFX by NOFX

Author:NOFX
Language: eng
Format: epub
ISBN: 9780306824784
Publisher: Da Capo Press
Published: 2016-03-12T05:00:00+00:00

57

Melvin

I went over to the Dog Patch Wino house with my girlfriend once. It was early in the day, so everyone was still passed out. It was like walking into a crime scene: bodies strewn all over the floor, furniture in awkward positions, and it smelled like piss and stale beer.

We were talking to Smelly when my girlfriend suddenly yelped, “Hey!” I asked her what happened and she explained that one of the limp bodies had reached up and grabbed her ass. She couldn’t tell who it was because they were all practically on top of each other. They were all giggling, but they pretended to be asleep.

The Winos were raunchy, trashy, fucked up dudes, but they weren’t so bad. And if it weren’t for the Winos we never would’ve met Aaron Abeyta.

My girlfriend’s friend Rob had just moved to L.A. from Omaha. He wanted to audition for our open guitarist slot, so I set him up with Mike. A few days later we walked into Mike’s apartment, and Mike invited him to sit down on his couch and play an unplugged electric guitar.

“Where’s the amp?”

“Let’s just try this first.”

Rob assumed he’d be jamming at full volume in a practice space with NOFX, so he was a bit thrown, but he did okay. Aaron’s audition was scheduled right after his, so Rob and I hung around to watch. As soon as he started playing we both knew Rob was beat.

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